Real & Raw Leija Heartspace Ramble :D
Want to know the real Leija? If so, read this post. If not, don’t read this post lol. I won’t take offence, I promise haha. This post comes from a very honest, real, raw & vulnerable place within. It’s actually from my little online diary that I write in from time to time. Allowing myself to write in a *stream of consciousness* kind of way is one of favourite therapies. I honestly don’t expect most people to read this whole thing- It’s long, and I know people are busy doing their own thing, buuut…my heart wanted me to put this out there for those who are interested…so here it is:
Photography/ videography is such a huge passion of mine!!!! I can’t wait until I get a Canon 5D Mark II and Glidecam http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uBLccEDmn40, so I can FINALLY take everything up quite a few notches!!! Universe, you know you wanna bring this camera into my life!!! You KNOW what my TRUE intentions are with this!
I love to inspire people to follow their heart, to connect with the natural world, with their authentic selves, and with everything REAL & RAW!!! I just loooove NATURE, creating anything- raw food, raw art, etc., exploring/ travelling, meeting new people (people from ALL walks of life), photography, film and just art in general! I have this dream of basically travelling the world, (documenting my travels via youtube of course), taking photos/ video footage of beautiful scenes in nature, beautiful food & beautiful people. I would LOVE to photograph/ film and interview every day people about their lives & share their beautiful, moving, funny, synchronistic, inspirational stories with the world! How needed is THAT work on this planet right now with all the FEAR news being pumped out??? Anyway, my intention is to do this work with my Swedish soul sista Natalie, who I actually just met yesterday for the first time (via skype)!!! Just two days ago, when I was photographing Kalamalka Lake, I told the Universe, with so much joy & excitement in my heart that I would LOOOVE to manifest a soul sister who is as passionate about REAL & RAW living as I am, who has a deep passion for travelling and photography, and who truly, truly…truuuuly gets me, on such a deep, deep level. People tell me all the time that I’m just like them, and that they toooootally get me! Now, while this is true to some degree, or even to a large degree, I have found that most people don’t truly get me….Or they get most of me, but there’s usually at least one disconnect there, which is completely cool! It doesn’t mean that we can’t have the most incredible, loving, healing, beautiful, ridiculously fun relationship…because we totally can!
Anyway, I connected with this Swedish girl just yesterday, Natalie, who truly *tears of joy* knows my heart and knows my soul…on a level that I can’t even describe with words. There’s just no doubt, no doubt!!! that we are from the same soul group and are here on this planet to do incredible work together! She knows why I do what I do, and knows that I am ANYTHING but ego- I’m all heart. <3 And that the only reason I shine my light so brightly is because I just have to- Not for myself, but for others, for this planet. This is why I came down to this planet! I came here to do a job, then I'm outta this dense dimension and back to where I came from, millions of dimensions away. Oh that's right, I said *millions* of dimensions away!!!
I was always an introvert growing up. WHHAAAA???? Leija an introvert? No fucking way! She’s like, the most outgoing person around??? Well, actually…no. Even though I would definitely have my outgoing/energetic/enthusiastic moments, a lot of the time, I was and still am that quiet, introverted, “let me just be and observe life” kinda person, who would rather frolic throughout a forest barefoot all day, picking wild edibles….or simply take photos of nature all day….then do ANYTHING in a city, or even anything with people! While I truly care about and love people, what I love just as much is the feeling I have when I’m all by myself, in nature…because I feel closest to the *home within* in nature. I love the way nature moves me….I love capturing the glow around wildflowers at sunset with my camera….I love dancing to beautiful music while I’m hiking and witnessing the trees dance right along with me….I love laughing my ass off at how freaking perfect everything really is…I love basking in MY OWN BLISS….I love being *silent* and simply observing the natural flow of life around me. The only reason a lot of people think I’m this very outgoing, energetic, talkative woman is because that’s what they see on youtube. But a 10 to 20 minute youtube video is just a 10 to 20 minute youtube video. Am I supposed to just stare into the camera and communicate my messages telepathically? Of course I’m going to talk a lot during the video…lol. I only make youtube videos when I feel that inspiration from within….and I change from an introvert to an extrovert in that moment! These days I’m definitely feeling the pull from within to be more expressive because I’m simple FEELING SO MUCH JOY that wants to be expressed! I’m also feeling the pull to really express all sides of Leija…So I’m going with it. But at the same time, I love simply connecting to that sacred space within and simply *being* in that beautiful place.
If I didn’t care this much about people, animals, and the planet as a whole, and if I didn’t have such important messages to spread (most of them that have come to me through being in nature, and connecting to that love/ source energy within), I would not be in the public eye… yeeeah…HELLZ NO!!! No freaking way! When people tell me they think I should model or do acting, I kind of laugh to myself because that is the LAST thing I’d want to do on this planet! I mean, sure, I’d love to be a part any kind of film or photoshoot that is promoting raw food, holistic healing, sustainability, the importance of connecting to your heartspace, etc….but acting/ modelling for the sake of looking pretty, or just making money? HELLZ NO! I don’t want THAT kind of attention EVER! There’s such a big part of me that actually doesn’t like attention believe it or not….but I’ve come to accept that when you shine your light, you receive attention. I’m at this level of acceptance of my true mission here on earth, which is why I’ve accepted the attention. I’ve gone BEYOND my ego, to a place where I simply focus on the whole. “How may I serve?” is my number #1 intention. I choose to focus on the bigger picture…like all the thousands of people I have helped in some way. I focus on the people who write to me, saying that I have COMPLETELY changed their lives! When someone writes to me and says….hold on, let me get an actual email from someone.
Ok, here is it: “leija i must write to you and thankyou from the bottom of my heart. i was seriously about to commit suicide but before pulling the trigger i asked god to give me just one reason to live. later that day was searching around onto youtube and came across your videos. you were so happy to be alive and connecting with the simple things in life like nature. you were giggling and just being yourself. you reminded me that its totally ok to just be me and that i dont have to try so hard to be someone im not. i realized how i was putting all these stupid expectations on myself and you reminded me that i was already perfect just the way i was. you sparked something within me and that night i started to cry and cry and cry. i cried so much that I could barely breath and i remembered what life was about and that i was worth living on this planet. you saved my life leija and i just cant express how grateful i am for you and your courage to put yourself out to the world. thankyou thankyou thankyou so much. i love you so much! thankyou!”
I’m at a point where I know it’s more important for me to shine my light and help/motivate/inspire others…then not to do so, even though there’s a part of me that just doesn’t want to deal with all the shit (from ego-projecting, unawake people) that comes along with it. I don’t think a lot of people understand how much shit I deal with. Most people think that my life is just so easy…lol. Well, these days it is a lot easier because I’m truly listening/ trusting in my heart, but at the same time, the more light you shine, the more attention you receive- and while a lot of that attention is super positive, a lot of it does a number on me because I’m such a sensitive soul. While we are all sensitive and empathic, some people are WAY more sensitive/ empathic than others! This planet’s vibrations are so dense that they really do a number on a lot of us. I do my best to protect myself, ground myself, heal myself, and not feed the drama, but I’m such an empath, and I *feel* so much…and see, Natalie totally gets this. Natalie totally feels this. She understands that I do what I do because my soul was here to bring about change, plain and simple….and through me simple sitting on top of a mountain, in a little cabin, gardening, painting/ taking photos all day, secluding myself from the world…well, that’s not fulfilling my mission…even though there is a part of me that wants to do just that.
I’m such a sensitive soul, such an empath, and if people truly understood this, and felt this, they wouldn’t throw their bullshit my way and accuse me of “just wanting attention” or “being an egomaniac” or “just being about the money” and complete utter nonsense like that! It’s not that I take the insults personally, because I know that people are just projecting from their ego, but because I am so sensitive, I can *feel* it on a deeper level. lol this is one of the reasons I go out in nature so much- to ground those judgements, criticisms and even hate daggers outta me! I’m not going to share some of the really toxic emails, but here’s a comment I received on a beautiful photo & inspirational post I made: “Whenever I see something from you or read something you write, all I can see is me, me me lol I’ve never seen anyone so self absorbed. I think that’s something you should look at.” That statement is just ridiculous and of course, an ego-projection….but just to clarify, I don’t make posts about myself because I wanna be like, “Oh look at me, and how fabulous I am in a “me, me, me EGO way”…It’s the complete opposite.
I inspire, motivate and heal through expressing and showing the world how freaking awesome life can be and how freaking gorgeous your body can become when you treat it like a temple! So of course I’m going to talk about me! Why the heck would I talk about you and what you should do and how you should live your life or what’s right for you? Pffftttt that’s no way to teach! That’s the old paradigm…the old, “Listen to me because I’m a guru, or I’m this professor. I’m superior to you. Don’t think for yourself. Just follow me. Or just memorize a bunch of facts and regurgitate it.” That way of teaching is SO OUTDATED in my humble opinion!!! I teach through being an example! Through sharing with people what works for me! Through encouraging people to try some of my helpful tips, but at the same time, encourage people to ALWAYS do what’s best for them! To listen to THEIR heart! To follow THEIR truth! I post beautiful, inspiring photos so I can inspire people to think, “Hmmm, she’s lookin’ mighty radiant. Maybe I’ll start eating some more raw food and start connecting with nature more often.” Or, “Hmmm….so following her heart is working for her…hmmm…maybe I should do the same.” You know what I’m sayin’? I know in my heart of hearts what my true intentions are and these strong waves of compassion, empathy and love that I feel within are enough fuel to keep me going strong! I highly encourage others to teach in this way! And to remember that everyone is just as much a teacher as they are a student!
Anyway, just wow, I mean, Natalie & I have pretty much EVERYTHING in common, from our roots (we’re both Scandinavian), to our lifestyle, passions, philosophies, sense of humour, relationships…to just about everything, and for the longest time, Natalie was actually asking the Universe to guide a soul sister into her life, one who would TRULY GET HER, and one who would LOVE to travel the world with her, take beautiful photos/ videos of everything real & raw- real & raw nature, people, food, EVERYTHING! And of course, someone who wants to continue to do lightwork in every way possible!
Natalie is actually an amazing photographer who just had a photography exhibition…and that is EXACTLY what I want to do, and what we both want to do together now and waaaaaaaaaaaa I could go on. See, this is what happens when you follow your heart and stay true to yourself! Wow, I just feel so so sooooo blessed and grateful for the Universe uniting us- and guess what?? SHE’S COMING TO MY RETREAT in just a few days!!! *tears of joy* Seriously, we both cried SOOO MUCH during and after that skype call because it sincerely felt like we were long-lost sisters finally re-united!!!!
Getting back to my dream….With so much fear-based news constantly being pumped out into the world, I feel that the world needs more POSITIVE, INSPIRATIONAL, BEAUTIFUL messages/ videos/ news NOW, more than ever before!!! I get sooo excited at the thought of travelling the world, taking (high quality) photos/ video footage of nature, food, people, and all that is beautiful, inspirational, real & raw!!! I would LOVE to be able to interview people with inspirational stories, from all walks of life, from ALL over the world! A lot of these people would be doing the most amazing humanitarian work that the mainstream just doesn’t talk/ hear about. A lot of these people would be people I’d meet spontaneously and synchronistically during my travels- They would appear to be ordinary people, yet have the most incredible things to say! It would be the “SYNCTOWN REAL & RAW TOUR” or somethin’ lol. ; )
Some of the most beautiful, inspiring souls I’ve ever met were homeless people, janitors, or just your every day person that I’d strike up a conversation with when out & about. These people are usually not into all the stuff I’m into, but simply have so much heart/soul/wisdom, and such incredible stories that would melt anyone’s heart and make anyone realize how amazing life really is- I want to interview THOSE guys & gals!!! I want us all to see/feel how truly beautiful, amazing and similar we all are! Minus those superficial and cultural differences, we all just want to have the freedom to be who we are, to love and be loved, and to really enjoy life! I want to show as many people as I can how much JOY, LOVE, INSPIRATION & MAGIC there is in the world RIGHT NOW!!!! ONE LOVE BABY!!! That’s a dream of mine that will manifest once I get a new mac laptop, a Canon 5D Mark II & Glidecam (and whatever other equipment I need), possibly do some fundraising, and create the space in my life for it to happen.
Thank-you Mother Earth, Higher Self, Angels, Spirit Guides & Universe…seriously THANK-YOU SO MUCH for the blessing that is Natalie, and for continually giving me the strength, love and protection I need to continue following my heart and doing my lightwork!!!! DAAHHH I LOVE YOU SO MUCH!!!!!
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